Geode.

I'm thoroughly unpredictable, yet predictably impulsive.

I'm free-flowing as the wind, yet tied down by rope.

I'm fiercely independent, yet deeply desire someone to share this life with.

I'm a lot like a geode.

 

On the outside, I don't look like much.

Just a shell, a bit rough to the touch. 

But break away the shell...

and I promise there's more.

Among the imperfections, a hidden brilliance worthy to explore.

But sometimes I still doubt; I still question.

Will anyone ever take an interest?

Will anyone actually stick it out?

Is it really worth all the work it takes to explore?

It may take a little while to find the crack that opens the shell, but I promise if you're serious, if you're sincere, if you think it's worth it, I'll help you find your way.

And once you're in, you're in; I won't push you away.

Just one of those days I wonder. One of those days I want. One of those days I'm humbled.

One of those days I realize I couldn't make it without God reminding me I'm always worth it to him.

Keeping Peace.

Something isn't right. And you know it.

But you don't want to cause a ruckus.

It really does not sit well with you.

Yet you let it slide.

You go along with it.

You play the game.

Why?

Because keeping peace is easier.

Is it worth it?

In Pride and Prejudice there's a scene where Elizabeth (the oldest sister) begs her father to reconsider letting her little sister go to see the soldiers in another city. Elizabeth knows in her gut it's a bad idea... she also knows her father is only agreeing to let her youngest sister, Lydia, go because it will keep peace.

She asks him a critical question: is this worth keeping the peace?

Later on Lydia runs away with a soldier she meets.

This is a huge deal, especially in the movie's time period, and it could have been prevented if only Elizabeth's father had decided it was more important to be right than to maintain peace.

Jesus even told us, "I didn't come to bring peace but a sword..." 

I don't know about you, but I'm pretty positive keeping peace isn't worth it.

Not when given the choice of keeping the peace or bringing life. 

Because in every situation, I will choose life over death.

Every time.

It may be difficult now, but in the end it is so, so worth it.

Predicting the Unpredictable.

In the last twenty-four hours I've seen a couple of intriguing news stories.

One: Scientists in Italy are being brought to trial for failing to adequately recognize and warn people about an earthquake; they are being {potentially} charged with manslaughter (to some degree).

Two: A few counties away, a high school boy brought a knife to school and harmed another boy. The victim's parents are suing the school for not preventing this... despite the fact that the school has many safety precautions in place and the fact that there should be personal (and parental) responsibility.

What are we coming to?

I feel like, as a whole, our world (at least the westernized parts of it) is getting to a point where they think we know EVERYTHING. 

We have all the answers.

Nothing can shake us.

Nothing can shock us.

We've got this.

And if something unpredictable happens, someone must be to blame.

Because unpredictable things just don't happen to us anymore.

This heightened arrogance is alarming, mainly because of its vast expanse.

Pride comes before the fall, yeah?

Well, I'm fairly positive the fall is coming. 

And it's going to hurt.

A lot.

Wake up you who are slumbering to death.

Justification.

I should absolutely be reading right now but... instead I'm sitting in Starbucks listening to John Mayer, drinking some tea, and chilling out until my next class starts. 

In all fairness, I did just do half of my homework for my online class this week (justification, yeah?).

Yeah, justification.

I'm sure I do that a lot.

I'm sure you do, too. 

But do I really need to justify my actions?

Should my actions be things that require justification?

God is my defender.

If he defends me, should I really need to worry about justifying my actions?

Hmm... 

There is certainly something to be said about living above reproach.

There's also something to be said about not worrying about what the world thinks.

Jesus came to bring the Kingdom, to bring life abundantly.

I see the Kingdom; it is at hand. 

I seek to live that life he tells me so much about. 

But first I have to trust, to stop justifying.

I have to simply be who I am. 

Loving Jesus. 

Loving others.

The end.

As a side note, I didn't actually watch the video. So, I'm not sure what it looks like...

Believe.

I wonder what God would say about my life. 

I wonder if the things I deem important would make him take my face in his hands and say, "Dear, I know you think this is important, but I tell you the truth, I have something better." 

In John 6, Jesus is addressing a crowd in Capernaum. He had just finished telling them not to concern themselves with things like perishable food but to concern themselves with eternal things.

"They replied, 'We want to perform God's works, too. What should we do?' Jesus told them, 'This is the only work God wants from you: Believe in the one he has sent.'"

Wow. 

The potential of those words...

I don't just mean the Sunday school, altar call, repeat-a-prayer "I believe," and I'm positive that's not what Jesus meant, either.

I mean, believe. Believe in the one he has sent. 

Belief so deep it alters the pattern of your life. 

That's what Jesus wants.

The Kingdom of Heaven is at hand.

Indiscribable

Sometimes, I look at things and wonder if I made the right decision or if I missed out.

But there's no use in crying over spilled milk.

(I say this very literally since spilling milk happens a lot at my job.)

In the end, I know that I am where I am now. And though those dreams were once mine, I've let them float away. My heart was once concrete, stuck in its ways, but now it's lost in You.
So, though those old dreams may flit on by, taunting me with their glam and glitz, I close my eyes and let them pass, clinging to what it is my heart is really made for.

I find myself not caring about the things most care about.
I'm tasting freedom for the first time, freedom I thought I already knew.
It's indescribable.