The Invisible Line

There's an invisible line that exists in a relationship between a man and a woman. It is the line which distinguishes whether the relationship is a friendship or a romance. Depending on the relationship, that line is clearly marked right away. But sometimes, it takes years to define. Inevitably, when you allow yourself to get close to someone of the opposite gender, romantic feelings develop to some capacity, even if they are just fleeting. It gets dangerous when those feelings appear in both parties at the same time, yet neither say a thing about them.

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It's hard to say exactly when I crossed that line with one of my closest friends, but I know it was over a year ago. And I know I wasn't the only one.

The strangest part about it: we didn't do anything that abruptly announced it to the world. But in our minds, in our hearts, we both went there; we both stepped over the line. And instead of saying something about it, we pretended nothing happened, hoping we could just enjoy where we were and that the line would just dissolve, becoming invisible.

Now, in this case, there were stipulations preventing us from saying anything or going any further than we did, but that doesn't change that this has been an incredibly murky pond to wade through without any sort of definition or direction to go off of. It would have been so helpful if one of us would have spoken up as soon as we noticed something, if nothing else just to define our relationship as only a friendship. Because today, today my heart hurts. And even though I feel slightly lead on, I have no one to blame but myself.

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And though there are many questions I would like to ask, I know God's timing is perfect; this just isn't quite His timing for my earthly love story. And even though it hurts some, I'm completely okay with that. Because what He has is incredibly worth the wait and so much more than I could ever imagine.

The Treasure is Worth Seeking

You know of a treasure. But to get there, you must sail to a small, unmapped island at the very center of the Pacific. The waters are dangerous, known to swallow even the largest of vessels in a single gulp. And if you thought getting there was tough, you're in for quite the surprise. To find the treasure, you must journey to the very center of the island, cutting through what seems like miles of thorns, to get to the top of the single, rocky mountain that rests on the island.

Once at the top of the mountain, you must then unearth the gate that opens to a long, winding path through the center of the mountain. The path is dark and populated by moss and vine. At this point, it may seem like turning around is the best option, but you go just a bit farther and see light emerge at the end of the path.

At the sight of the light, you begin to run. It's taken you years, but the moment has finally arrived. You come to the final vine laden doorway, stick out your hand, push the vines aside and step through. You stop, in awe of what you have found. It's the most breathtaking sight you've ever seen; a secret oasis only known by you. You think to yourself, "I'm so glad I didn't stop!"

After a little bit, you finally gain enough composure to explore the treasure you have found. You get to know it, inside and out, every waterfall, every tree limb, every blade of grass and sand, every beautiful detail of the area. And at night, you are able to look up and gaze at the stars. It's been an incredible day, one that you won't be able to forget.

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A hundred years ago, the thought of a voyage across the open seas wet the appetite. Adventure was enchanting; the longing for it, unquenchable...

Now, everything we need, everything we think we could want, is at our fingertips; it's ours for the taking. But is it just about having what we want and need? Is the journey just about the destination? Or is there something to the voyage, the trek for truth, the danger it takes to get there?

Do you think you would have been quite as elated to find your oasis if it was handed to you and you didn't have to work for it? Would it have been as valuable?

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I feel a lot like like that secret oasis, right now; only, I don't feel like anyone is willing to go through all the work to come find me, to get to know me, to find me valuable. I don't feel worthy of uncovering. If only they could see what was beyond the shell of the mountain. And if only I could see what they see.

There's only so much to lose, so far to fall. One day, someone will be courageous enough to come looking for the treasure, to come looking for me, to dive into the depths of who I am. But until that day, I will choose to stand on firm ground, knowing that some One has already set sail. He has captured my heart and I His, with just one glance.